As parents one of our greatest responsibilities is to bring our children up to be strong, resilient, self-confident and true to our family values. Growing up in our modern world where our children are faced with cyber bullies, loose morals and temptations at every corner it’s good to know that traditional parenting methods still work.
Positive Parenting Through Encouragement, Praise And Personal Responsibility
As parents we must teach our children our values before the world does. With the invention of social media and 24 hour television this task is becoming more difficult each year. Thankfully the most effective way to guide our children is still through love, encouragement, praise and personal responsibility.
Focusing on your children’s strengths through encouragement for their efforts will help to build their self-esteem and confidence. A strong sense of self comes from within but young children need you to light their internal spark.
Just how do you do that? It’s simple, show them to see their natural talents and assets. Be positive and give them praise when they have done something great.
Try using phrases like:
“You did such a great job, I like the way you did…”
“I know you can do it, try again!”
“I can see you worked really hard on that.”
A word of caution, just as we want to give our children praise and be encouraging we must also remember that giving compliments for poorly done work can be damaging. It is okay to gently tell your child when they have not tried their best. Tell them you know they could do better and encourage them to try again. False compliments will often reinforce unacceptable behavior. Expecting your child to try again, and to perform better so they can be proud of what they have accomplished will build up their self-confidence.
Personal responsibility is an important life skill all children need to learn. Being responsible to themselves, to the family and to God will help your child learn to hold themselves accountable. Children as young as two can learn to help the family by doing age appropriate jobs (chores) around the house. My own sons ages 3 and 5 help by, getting themselves dressed for the day, carrying a grocery bag in from the van, sweeping the floor, taking their dinner dishes to the kitchen sink, wiping off the table and picking up the toy room. What jobs could your children be doing?
Teach responsibility through failure. As a mom it can be hard to watch your children fail. However, letting them do just that once in a while can help them be reminded of how important being responsible to themselves and the family truly is. If you constantly bail them out by doing their work for them you are stealing from them. You are taking away the opportunity to feel disappointment when they have failed and the even bigger reward of feeling satisfied for succeeding! To know the one they must experience the other.
Taking the time to make these things a part of your daily routine will set your children up for success. Who knew simple things like encouragement, praise and personal responsibility were still so relevant today.
This post was shared on the Made For Kids linky party. November 2, 2015
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